Cursillo in Scotland

Servant Community

OK, so Di and I were late for Servant Community - it meets at Kinnoull, and it's quite a drive - but we were there in time for the talks by Gill McWhirter and Bill MacAusland, and for all the business of the meeting. It was really well attended - great to see new faces there! But that's not really what I'm posting about just now. Rather, it's another good thing about Cursillo which struck me during Bill's talk, when he pointed out that being called as an apostle didn't mean you were special. You can take that two ways, can't you - that you're just ordinary when called, and that you stay ordinary as God works through you.

If you're a Cursillista, you'll know that jobs don't stay in one person's hands for longer than three years. Then everyone moves on - Lay Directors, Spiritual Directors, Ultreya reps. No time to become entrenched, no time to reach the stage of thinking you're special or indispensible. Your time ends and you're back in the ranks. It's great.

In our churches, this doesn't always happen, does it? Especially if the congregation is small and there seems not to be a big enough number of people willing to take on the jobs. So people become this  rep or that warden, secretary or sacristan, and stay there. It's too easy to think there's no-one else, and too easy to become complacent or conceited. And if someone new does come along, there seems to be no way "in", because of the sitting tenant of the job. We need to be aware of this, don't we,and be ready to move over when our time comes.

And maybe this is a good time for me to say I need to step down as Argyll and The Isles Ultreya rep - any volouteers out there?

Chris

Singing Workshop in Millport

The Cathedral of The Isles, Millport, Isle of Cumbrae was the wonderful venue for the Cursillo Singing Workshop last weekend. Twenty of us were lucky enough to take part in this exciting, stimulating workshop, run by John McIntosh (#46), ably assisted by his wife Christine (#38).

We arrived as a motley collection of folk with varied musical ability and experience and left as a choir. In between there was fun, fellowship and above all, hard work! We fell into bed exhausted but happy on the Saturday night after singing Compline to a plainsong setting - a new experience for many of us - having learned about excited diaphragms and raised palates, strings attached to our heads and how to place a note on a shelf.

Along with the technique, we were privileged to be the first to perform the Kilbride Service, a mass setting hot from the pen of the Maestro himself. We sang it at the Sunday Eucharist, along with the anthem 'Ave Maria' by Arcadelt. Much to everyone's delight (and not a little surprise) we really did make a joyful noise unto the Lord! So much so that everyone wants to do it again next year.

So thanks for the idea, Christine and thanks to both McIntoshes for sharing your talent with the rest of us. And thanks to the enthusiastic Cursillistas who travelled from places as far flung as South Uist and Moray to join together in song to the glory of God.
Di Tennent (#40)

Cursillo - the pros

Having once again seen the enabling power of the Cursillo method in action at Scotland #52, I’ve been thinking about what people find good in Cursillo – a sort of counter-balance to the previous post. That’s why I’m starting a new post, because I feel it’s too important to bury away at the end of a big comments section. And I’d like to say right away that these are personal observations, attributable only to me.

First of all I have to say that on #52 the team worked very hard at the approach to the weekend, along the lines I mentioned in my first comment to the previous post. Sensitivity to the needs of individual participants was very much in evidence, with the result that the strict adherence to the laid-down format for the weekend worked. Period.

But beyond these specifics? I’d like to offer these thoughts as a starting point for what makes a Cursillo weekend so special for so many people. And the first thing is staring us in the face. If you tell someone that you’re away to spend a long weekend in a monastery they will almost certainly think you a tad odd, these days. Why? Because most ordinary lay people don’t go in for that sort of thing. It’s ok for clergy to come on all snippy about psychological manipulation – but most clergy, in our church anyway, have experienced retreats and living in community at some time in their lives, even those who have (regrettably, IMO) given up on such practices as they grow older. So a Cursillo weekend will be the first time many of the participants have ever done anything remotely like a retreat, the first time they have experienced the rhythm of the daily offices and eucharist, the first time they have committed themselves to spending three days and nights exclusively with a group of strangers.

And what about these strangers? This is the next point I want to make. The team, by spending preparation time before the weekend together and individually, by arriving at the venue a whole day before the participants, by praying together, worshipping together, praying for each other and – vitally – administering the Sacrament to each other, have become a unity committed to supporting one another, supporting the leadership team and doing everything in their power to ensure the well-being and happiness of  … a group of strangers. This is, to use a well-known term, by way of being an Ideal, isn’t it? An ideal Christian community – and we should ask ourselves just how common such a community is in the lives of the majority. No wonder there’s an impact.

Now think about how the team sets about ministering to the participants. Mature adults tend to be carers, supporters, parents, providers … and for three whole days they’re allowed – no, encouraged – to be child-like. (Note: not childish. An important distinction) And the encouragement is not of the impersonal institutional kind, like a hospital or a care home, but individually targeted by individuals who themselves benefited from just such ministry. Some people find it hard to “take” in this way; the more perceptive can come to recognise this side of their nature and find even more joy in the eventual acceptance.

Finally, of course, there is the opportunity to discuss the things of the Spirit in total security. Not a big deal, perhaps, for the clergy, but a huge step for someone who has perhaps spent their adult life wondering if others felt as they do about God, about faith, about the church. At the weekend they have the intimate strangers – the kind who can become so important in an intense situation like a hospital ward - all in the same situation, presided over by a table leader who perhaps reminds them of a parent – enabling, moderating, never judging. Often participants sum the experience up as one in which they felt more secure and more loved than at any time since childhood.

So for those who suspect something sinister or cliquish or divisive in Cursillo, those who perhaps think the method takes precedence over the message, I’d say this: Try it. Don’t take my word for it – but don’t take someone else’s word against it. And if you’re ordained and have not experienced Cursillo for yourself, remember how privileged are your insights and your experiences. Cursillo helps ordinary people to add a new dimension and new companions to their spiritual journey.  Come and see!
Chris

Why do Some People Dislike Cursillo?

Cursillo is not for everyone. The Weekend experience can be less than enjoyable for some, while for others it’s downright miserable. We’ve all heard of people to whom this happened and we’ve been disappointed that Cursillo was not a success for them.

Gill Pilling has therefore posed the following questions:
• What percentage of participants find Cursillo unhelpful?
• Does our method of sponsorship reliably identify those whom Cursillo would not suit?
• Are we able to give a little more detail of what constitutes a weekend without either deterring potential participants or detracting from the impact of the weekend? Would this help prepare people better for the weekend?
• Undoubtedly Cursillo is the ‘kick start’ for many, but by tempering slightly some of the activities during the weekend, would we seem to be less intrusive into participants’ personal and emotional space and therefore avoid creating any barriers? As a result would we be able to reach out and inspire even more participants?
• Are there other participants who find some aspects of the weekend a barrier and return home feeling isolated or inadequate, particularly in the face of so much celebration by others?
• Do we offer adequate support after the weekend to those participants who have struggled with the weekend in one way or another?
• In what ways may Cursillo be seen as divisive and how can this be avoided?
• If there is division in a Church regarding Cursillo how can we address this?

Sponsorship

Good communication is essential, not just in the explanation of the purpose of Cursillo and of what constitutes ‘the weekend’ but also the ability to identify and hear any reticence and doubts expressed by potential participants and to deal with these accordingly.
If we try to give details of every aspect of the weekend we would undoubtedly discourage potential participants, however we do need to be open and honest in our outline of the weekend. We will not detract from the impact of the Cursillo weekend with a brief outline of what is involved. Imagine trying to describe an aeroplane to someone who has never seen one. Too graphic an account could scare them away but if an outline description is provided the person will not actually realise the enormity and full impact of the aeroplane. It will not become real, until they have experienced it. So it would be for Cursillo.
The Servant Community are looking at the leaflet given to potential participants with their application form; this should make this part of the job of Sponsorship easier.
How should we support someone once they have decided to attend a weekend? Frequent enquiries as to whether they have any questions regarding the weekend could make them very apprehensive. However we must ‘leave the door open’ by offering to answer any queries which may occur to the participant before their weekend and we must be prepared to listen for any expressions of reticence and allow opportunity for these to be shared.
The ‘Welcome Home’ is a lovely idea but how does it feel if you are a participant who has struggled with some of the aspects of the weekend? Expressing doubts and disappointments to an enthusiastic group of Cursillistas who seem to have worked hard to support you may be quite a daunting task, particularly if other participants do not feel the same way and are full of enthusiasm which you feel unable to share. I feel therefore that it is important to remember, as mentioned in the Sponsorship guidelines, to have a ‘debrief’ with each participant individually, before the Welcome Home, perhaps over a cup of coffee. This opportunity can be used to listen and support the participant whatever their opinions about the weekend may be. There may be issues that can be clarified for them simply but it is more important to listen and if there are any significant concerns the participant should be directed to, for example, the Diocesan Spiritual Advisor.

The weekend

Some participants can find Palanca difficult, particularly the volume, which is undoubtedly a measure of the success of the weekends over the years. For other participants Palanca can be the most important aspect of the weekend. The prayer that surrounds the weekend is of course the essential ingredient. Our Palanca must reflect this and be prayerfully produced allowing the Holy Spirit to guide us, rather than reflecting our own experiences of the weekend, which may not match those of the participant to whom we are sending. Specific messages about what the participant should be feeling can be unhelpful. Unless we know a person really well, we should only use Palanca for messages of encouragement and as an outward sign of our prayer support? A significant number of people realise the huge impact of Palanca after the weekend, not at the time it is delivered, when it may seem overwhelming. It may be helpful to say to participants that they may prefer to keep their Palanca for later or take it home to read. We should make them feel under no obligation to open it at the time. I work in a Hospice. We serve meals to patients on small plates in small attractive portions and give them permission to eat just as much as they feel able to manage and either to leave the rest or save some for later. By doing this we find that patients who have not eaten properly for weeks suddenly find their appetite improving. Should this approach apply to Palanca?

One of the difficulties with a Cursillo weekend can be that the best thing for one Cursillista may be the worst for another. This is inevitable. However if we do everything with sensitivity, although participants may still find certain aspects of the weekend unhelpful but they should find them neither a barrier, nor such a huge obstacle that their enjoyment of the weekend is spoilt. If we remember we are shepherds leading and encouraging our flock of participants we should not go far wrong. Some sheep will be more timid than others and at ‘Wake Up’ we must remember the more hesitant ones. Day Three of the weekend is celebrating the Resurrection. On that First Day of the Week only the few went to the tomb, the others were at home. Can we not wake participants more gently, yet with an excited ‘Christ is risen!’ and then celebrate together downstairs? Would a slightly quieter initial waking really detract so much from the impact of this part of the weekend? It might make it easier for a number of participants.

Division in Church

How can this be avoided?
• We need to remember to always give open invitations to Ultreyas so that we are not perceived as a group apart.
• We need to explain the language and the purpose of Ultreya and the Floating Group Reunions to any visitors who do attend so that they feel as integrated as possible.
• If we use a Church room we should always either pay for the use of the room or give a donation to avoid any feelings of unfairness.
• When arranging Group Reunions or other Cursillo activities with other Cursillistas we should do this discreetly to avoid being seen as a ‘holy huddle’.
• At Church meetings it may be politic to sit separately rather than together!
• We must remember we are members of the Church first and avoid giving the false impression that Cursillo comes before Church.

Joyce Huggett has good suggestions for listening in her book ‘Listening to Others’:
• ‘ We need to listen with one ear to the person who is talking and we need to have the other big ear turned in to God’ She quotes this from Anne Long, author of ’Listening’
• Place Jesus between you and the person you are listening to.

Cursillo is an amazing tool. We are only in marketing; the Holy Spirit is in charge of sales. We need to try to wrap our amazing gift so it has impact, is obviously available for all, freely given. It is a fine line between doing that and using so many wrappings that the gift becomes forgotten and the wrappings become the focus. Let us keep up the prayers.
Ultreya! Gill Pilling

Edgar's interment

There will be a service of thanksgiving for the life of Edgar Pacey in Holy Trinity Church, Dunoon on Saturday 3 June at 2.30pm, followed by the interment of his ashes in the grave of his wife Pauline in Holy Trinity churchyard. I hope there will be some Cursillistas present from outwith the area - Cursillo was very important to Edgar and brought him considerable joy. Alex Black has agreed to speak at the service, and Edgar's family are delighted to know this.

Chris

Easter Fourth bridge

Most of you should have received your Fourth Bridge by now. If you have recently moved and you haven't received your copy, I may not have updated your address on my list. Please email me at: [email protected] with any updates.

Apologies that the booking form for the Cumbrae Music Workshop in October was not included with FB. Mea culpa. It will arrive in a separate mailing. I hope there will be a good turnout for this event - it should be a great learning experience as well as a fun weekend.

Ultreya! Di Tennent

Edgar

Edgar
Originally uploaded by goforchris.

Shortly after we arrived home in Dunoon, I had a phone call from New Zealand to tell me that Edgar, with whom we had been staying, had died peacefully, surrounded by his family. Although he was ill throughout the period of our stay with him, it was his prime concern that we should have a good holiday, and my blog reflects the excellence of our stay there. As his health declined, he seemed even more determined that this should not impinge on our activities, and so it was not until the last week of our stay that he went to hospital for the last time.

Edgar Pacey was a priest in the Scottish Episcopal Church, serving in the dioceses of Glasgow and Galloway and Argyll and The Isles. He was a man of immense learning and down to earth realism. For many years he was a full-time teacher in Glasgow schools, and talked often of his time in Penilee. His last work in Scotland was to hold together the congregation of his own Holy Trinity Church in Dunoon during a long vacancy. When he emigrated to New Zealand to be with his family, his church family missed him sorely.

One of the great joys of his last years was his Cursillo experience. On my last meeting with him, he talked about how he had been instrumental in making me ready for Cursillo and then I in turn had sponsored him on his weekend. It changed his life, and when he moved to New Zealand he quickly found a home in Dunedin Cursillo. A Cursillo priest whom I know only as Jimmy visited him at my request three days before he died.

He came home from hospital last Friday. On Saturday evening his family held a party. A wonderful party where the teenage grandchildren laughed and joked and everyone had a dram – including Edgar. When we left, it was with the sense of a man serene and confident in the love that surrounded him and the God to whom he was going. It was an exemplary and inspiring end. He died fifteen hours after we arrived home.

I count myself fortunate beyond words that he was my friend. May he rest in peace and rise in glory.

Chris

Provincial Ultreya

Hello everyone. The time for Fourth Bridge is drawing near and the reports are coming in - thank you all those who have been so prompt! For the not so prompt, may I remind you that we go to press the minute the participant list is complete for #51. Then about a week must pass during which there is much nail-biting (from me) until it comes back from the print shop, followed by frantic activity as the envelopes are stuffed (it occurred to me about two editions back that I could save panic by having the stamps and labels already on the envelopes before FB came back from the printers - duh!).

Inside this edition will be a pull-out leaflet about the Provincial Ultreya. In case this has escaped your notice - and it shouldn't have if Colin Mair has anything to do with it - it's being held in Aberdeen this year at St Devenick's, Bieldside. For more information, go to this web page. Last year's event in Argyll and The Isles was such a happy day, despite terrible weather, and I'm sure this year's is going to be equally great. Book your B&B now!

Ultreya!

Dunedin Cursillo banner
Originally uploaded by goforchris.

On our last full day in New Zealand, John and I attended part of the Dunedin Ultreya, which was taking place in St Andrew's, Cromwell. We walked down from Edgar's house - about a mile and a half - and were warmly welcomed as having come all the way from Scotland, which made it sound as if we'd walked all the way. There were about 60 Cursillistas there, some of whom had made the kind of journey we make when we travel from Argyll to Perth.

It was interesting to see the similarities - we felt quite at home, for example, when there was a question about the proper use of computers to facilitate communication. The long-suffering computer-savvy man behind me had obviously explained all this more than once! It was interesting, however, that they seemed to think that ten is a good number for a Group Reunion - I mentioned to one Cursillista that we tended to go for four, which he personally felt was a better idea.

We stayed long enough to meet with several others over lunch - so many people here have Scottish connections and were eager to place us on their personal map of Scotland - and to hear our new friend Sue give a very moving and effective witness talk. When we left there were hugs and tears and blessings and we felt very much part of the family.

If any of the Dunedin Cursillistas read this - De Colores! Ultreya! - or as we might say at home: "G'aun yersel's!"

Fourth Day in Cromwell

Cursillo meeting
Originally uploaded by goforchris.

This evening John and I were present at a Reunion Group with a difference, when a group of Cursillistas from the Cromwell area of Central Otago, New Zealand, met at the home of Edgar Pacey to share their reunion group with us.

What a lovely group of people! And they can sing, too - even though Edgar insisted on a couple of verses of De Colores. This picture was taken on Edgar's patio after the meeting - you can see John (second left, back) and Edgar (second right, back) in his Alabama Cursillo T shirt. Notice the local custom of wearing rainbow scarves - though it was so hot that only Erik could bear to wear his!

Chris